Expat 30 Challenge Day 29
Are you a jerk? Good you might become successful.
There are many very talented people who give out a persona online. They become successful and we judge their success instead of their personality.
As a life coach I have met quite a few very successful sportsmen, business owners and artists.
Invariably I would say some of them are jerks. They know it.
These are the reasons I believe being a jerk can help you become successful.
1. They act without caring what others think
A jerk is simply someone who has very little empathy for what others think or feel.
We are deeply wired and conditioned to pay attention to others, listen and seek the approval from our communities.
Since the days we were sitting in a cave around a fire with our tribe to our modern online tribes, our search for acceptance is one of our essential needs.
This needs feeds the status-quo and kills entrepreneurship.
To be successful you need to leave the tribe, your support network and your family to create something new.
As Expats we are well aware of the tensions created by leaving our homeland.
When a business owner leaves the pack to start his or her journey, they are easy to point out, just follow the moaning and whining from their peers.
2.They learn to filter
As your success grows you simply don’t have time to be as approchable to everyone.
Unfortunately you have to filter who will help you make the best use of your time.
Those you turn down will call you a jerk.
With email and social media tools, the access vs. time issue has been multiplied. Even if you give your time away for nothing there will be always be ‘one more quick question’.
I strongly believe in charity and giving back, but when someone is making a profit out of your free-time and advice, who is the jerk?
3. They have extreme focus
Anyone who achieves a goal will tell you that focus is essential.
Focusing means that you give one objective all your attention, time and energy.
You are willing to do whatever it takes to reach it. You have zero tolerance for anything which will stop you from reaching your goal.
The result brought by focus is awesome but it also brings some serious collateral damage.
- The best professional athlete I know has a broken marriage and children who grow-up without him
- The richest man I ever met lives with the simple rule of not lending money to anyone and refuses to give to charity
- The most successful business man I interviewed treats everyone that can’t help him as expendable
4.They have extreme confidence
Part of being a jerk is the ‘I’m always right attitude’.
Nobody is always right but few of us are willing to commit to an idea until it fails.
The jerks are willing to crash and burn for their idea when the rest of us will just avoid committing.
The same cockiness will also allow them to get back up faster and try something else. Failure doesn’t phase them “they are always right”.
5. They trade-off now for the future
Successful ‘jerks’ know how to keep their vision and dream in mind when they trade-off a current relationship, or a current client for the much bigger picture.
They invest every ounce of their life, finances, and convince others to do the same. Many will label them a cheapskate, a workaholic, or a jerk along the way.
For them it’s worth the trade-off.
Your assignment for today is simple:
- How much are you willing to trade?
- Are you comfortable letting some people think you are a jerk?
- Do you want everyone to love you, or are you willing to be a jerk?
photo credit: AZRainman